I began exploring the idea of participating in a yoga teacher training program around 2006. I was unhappy with my career. I longed for a simpler, more mindful lifestyle, and yoga made me happy. It seemed a no-brainer at the time. In 2008 I discovered and participated in the one and only teacher training program offered at Heartwood Yoga in Birmingham and feel so fortunate to have been one of the lucky few. I finished my training in summer of 2009 and began looking for venues to offer my services.
Fast forward a few years. I was teaching several classes a week and working full time while my husband and I built a web development company on the side. I thought if I could bring my income up to what I was making at my day job, I could seamlessly leave my job and step into my new roll without a hitch. Ha.
I worked myself into a big old mess. I was living far from mindfully, always stressed as I rushed to meet the next obligation. Everyday presented an insurmountable list of to-dos as I experimented with moving things around in my day, thinking I’d find extra time somewhere so I could accomplish MORE, MORE, MORE.
And finally I did it. I left my job in 2012 and we were a two-person boutique web firm, Deluxe Interactive Services. LLC and everything. I now assumed I’d have so much time, I could add a side business on top of this one and a second band to boot.
I loved everything I was doing. There was just too much of it. And when our business fell off in the winter months of 2013, after we’d just recovered from the slow winter months of 2012, it was all hands on deck. We worked endlessly to gain more business while the bills mounted. And still I kept up with all my other activities. Things like my personal yoga practice, care for my dogs, and sleep took a hit.
My weight crept upward along with my blood pressure. I’ve had low blood pressure my entire life, and here I was, an overweight yoga teacher with high blood pressure feeling completely whipped. And so I dropped my social life, still clinging to all these baskets I’d put my hands in.
ENOUGH
After spending years of teaching mindfulness as part of my yoga classes, I figured it was time I did a little more of the walk. I did two things. First, I declared “All Deluxe All the Time” a hobby. Instead of my rule of two posts per week and energy spent on products and services, I would only post occasionally when time allowed and inspiration struck.
Second, I made the even more difficult decision to let go of my yoga teaching. It was hard, but once the decision was made, even though I was sad, I also felt a great lift off my chest. I completed my then current classes and left my lovely students with resources for continuing their work. Now I could be a student again!
Sometimes we must just stop and take a look at what we do to ourselves. We can become so immersed in life that we forget to look at the big picture. I know that I am my mother’s daughter and will always have to be watchful for not keeping myself over busy. This is a good start. I may teach again someday, once I’ve rejuvenated myself and learned more. Then I’ll have something to teach. And who knows, maybe someday a random post will go viral and I’ll be in demand. I’ll sell products and write books and be able to totally work on living mindfully, growing my food, repurposing, upcycling—all the things that I so love to do. For now, they will just be my little loves.
My take on the golden rule? Do for yourself, what you would do for your neighbor or friend! It works both ways, ya know.